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Sometimes, you should be very specific with your wishes!

Princess Heather — Sat, 17 Oct 2009 04:33:34 +0000

Your femdom Mistress gets a lot of small dicked losers who call me and want to have me make fun of their pathetic little pricks. I couldn’t help but to think of them when I heard this next one… it also goes to show that even when you get what you want, if you aren’t specific about it, it may not quite be what you had in mind… which can apply to so many things in life! :giggle:

A newly married couple move into a house and the wife notices a mirror hanging up on the wall. She goes up to it and says ‘Mirror mirror on the wall, what part of my body does my husband like most of all?”

And the mirror replies, “Your tits.”

She then says, “Mirror mirror on the wall, give me size forty four!” And presto! She gets really big tits. Excitedly, she rushes downstairs to show her husband, who is amazed upon seeing her. HE asks her what happened, and she tells him about the mirror.

The husband rushes upstairs to the mirror and says, “Mirror mirror on the wall, what part of my body does my wife like most of all?”

The mirror replies, “Your dick.”

Excitedly, the husband requests, “Mirror mirror on the wall, make my dick touch the floor.”

So his legs fall off.

:giggle: Now I really don’t believe that is what the husband had in mind, do you? :giggle: I mean, how many of you small dicked losers would like to get a wish like that granted for you? Not the leg falling off part, but the dick touching the floor part… I guess you should practice now what you would wish for, should you ever have the opportunity! :giggle:

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Be careful what you ask for from a femdom!

Princess Heather — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 04:59:37 +0000

Here is another funny from your femdom Mistress, for your enjoyment! Let me know if you enjoy these kind of jokes, and if you retell them to your friends, I want to hear all about how they enjoyed it too!

A man with a twenty five inch penis goes to the doctor to complain that he is unable to get any women to have sex with him. They all tell him that his penis is too large. (don’t some of you small dicked losers wish you had that problem? :giggle: ) “Doctor,” he asks in total frustration, “is there any way you can shorten it?”

The doctor replies, “Medically, son, there is nothing that I can do. But, I do know this witch who may be able to help you.”

So the doctor gives him directions to the witch. The man calls upon the witch and relays his story. “Witch, my penis is twenty five inches long and I can’t get any women to have sex with me. Can you help me shorten it?”

The witch stares in amazement, scratches her head, and then replies, “I think I have a solution to your problem. What you have to do is go to this pond deep in the forest. In the pond, you will see a frog sitting on a log who can help solve your dilemma. First you must ask the frog, will you marry me? Each time the frog declines your proposal, your penis will be five inches shorter.”

The man’s face lights up and he dashes off into the forest.

Finding the frog, he says, “Will you marry me?”

The frog looks at him dejectedly and replies, “No.”

The man looks down and suddenly his penis is five inches shorter! “Wow!” he screams out loud. “This is great! but it’s still at twenty inches, so I’ll ask the frog to marry me again.”

“frog, will you marry me?” the guy shouts.

The frog rolls it’s eyes in it’s head and screams back, “No!”

The man feels another twitch in his penis, looks down and it’s another five inches shorter.

The man laughs. “This is fantastic!” He looks down at his penis again… fifteen inches long, and reflects for a moment. Fifteen inches is still a monster… just a little less and it would be ideal.

Grinning, he looks across the pond and says, “Frog, will you marry me?”

The frog looks back across the pond shaking it’s head. “How many damn times do I have to tell you? No, no and for the last time, NO!”

hahahahahahahahahaha!!!

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Mistresses love teasing little pathetic dicks

Princess Heather — Sun, 26 Jul 2009 20:43:58 +0000

More and more, I am finding that my fellow dominant women love to tease men who have pathetic little dicks. I mean, I know that everyone realizes we would never fuck a pathetic little prick… why would we, since we don’t have to? :giggle: But I am not so sure that you all realize how much fun it is to us to tease these men about their…. well, shall we say, shortcomings? :giggle: No pun intended! Or, well, maybe yes, pun intended. :giggle:

I think the thing that makes it so much fun… well, at least for me… is that these small dicked losers seem to enjoy it so much. I mean, they really get off on it! They love having dominant, beautiful women make fun of their tiny little dicks, knowing full well that we will never have sex with them or even touch their pathetic pricks. Their little tator tots get hard and excited just from hearing us make fun of them, or tease them about how small they are, and even using our feet to smack and slap them is something erotic to them.

I know that many people don’t understand how this works or how this can happen, but that’s ok, it isn’t necessary to understand it. It is enough to just enjoy doing it… and believe me, when it comes to making fun of tiny dicked losers, my Mistress friends and I have absolutely no problem at all enjoying it to the fullest. Is your little prick all excited just thinking about it? Then give me a call and let’s play! :giggle:

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More small dick fun with your femdom Mistress

Princess Heather — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 06:44:28 +0000

Ahhh yes, the Small Penis Posse…. they have been in full force this week, and for some reason they have all corraled their cocklettes in to me! :giggle: I find it very amusing that such small dicklettes can cause such a big reaction to the loser that they are attached to… especially since they certainly do nothing for me! :giggle:

I had one such small dick loser call me today for a little penis humiliation (no pun intended, but damn, what can a girl do? :giggle: ) and I was so unfortunate that he wanted to get on web cam for me to show off what he didn’t have. And let me tell you, I wasn’t missing out on much by not seeing it all of my life! :giggle: It was a pathetic three inches… and I laughed my ass off when this poor unfortunate soul said to me that it wasn’t that small… and surely three inches was about average, right? Hahahahahaha!!! I could barely stop laughing long enough to tell him that no, three inches was certainly NOT average, thank GOD, and even if it was, that would not be enough for me to want to fuck… not by a long shot!

Now you would think that hearing something like that from your femdom Mistress would make a wanker zip up and run far and fast, but no, not this slut! It only turned him on even more, and before you know it, SPLAT! A little bug splatter sized cum mess was there for the cleaning. I love how these pathetic boys make me laugh!

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Role plays are fun for you and your femdom Mistress

Princess Heather — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 20:31:10 +0000

I was chatting with a horny stroker slut in instant message today, and he asked me what kinds of phone sex sessions I enjoy doing, and I must say that one of my favorite types of phone sessions to do is a role play session with my kinky sluts. I like doing them because I really have a very fun and wild imagination, and sometimes it’s just fun to pretend you’re someone else for a while, especially when it’s kinky!!!

So the caller I had last night was one of these kinds of fun kinky role play sessions. He wanted to role play that I was his sister’s best friend, and that he’s had a crush on me for a long time. So I go over to their house, but she’s not home, only he is. He invites me in to hang out for a while, and then starts making the moves on me. Well, this only had one effect on me…. amusement! You see, his sister had told me that she had seen him in the shower before, and he had a tiny pathetic little dick… so I already knew that I would not even come close to wanting to fuck him! :giggle: I made him sniff my panties and then suck on my toes, and if you are interested in knowing what else I did to this horny little bitch, you’ll have to call me and find out… and maybe, if you’re lucky enough, I’ll do it to you, too! :giggle:

Mistress Phone Sex with Princess Heather
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